Trapped

Have you ever felt like if you were trapped,
trapped in between two different things,
trapped in between two different worlds,
each offering you something you want,
but at the same time leaving you with desires,
desires that come from part of the other one?

Have you ever felt trapped on your feelings,
knowing you like two different things,
but also knowing you have to decide for one,
and you really love that one you want to have,
but the other also have something that attracts you,
that make you wonder how far you will have to go to get it,
how much will you have to sacrifice to also have it,
by taking the risk of loosing the one that you really want?

Have you ever been trapped in between two decisions,
wanted to do something really bad but not be able to,
even though your soul cries out loud for it,
and your body feels it and push you onto it,
but you are there saying to yourself you can't do it,
that eventhough you want it so much you just can't decide,
and you just think and think about it,
knowing the decision that you take will change your life,
knowing that once you take it there could not be a way back,
that what you do will stay done and wont be forget?

I have felt trapped like that,
it is a feeling that confuses me,
that put the real me to the test,
a test of strength, desire, loyalty,
a test of values and morals,
a fight against forbidden thoughts,
against forbidden actions and desires,
a fight agains my own inner and outter self.

I have felt the pression of it on the course of my life,
sometimes it burns on the deeper of my soul,
it makes my skin wants to crawl out,
it makes me want to just run away without having to decide,
it haunts me on my dreams and follow me on my thoughts.

But only one thing brings me back to life,
one thing brings the relief my soul so much desire,
that thing is to know that i am not alone on this fight,
that millions of people fight side by side like i do,
that they try very hard and don't take loosing as an option,
that they fight for those they really love,
that they do sacrifice themself for those they so much care about,
willing to give up what their innerselves want,
and be there for those they know that do really love them,
those been their soulmates, their kids, their families and friends.

Copyright (C) 2007 German S. Benitez